So you know how sometimes you have a party but you just don’t get to hangout with everyone at it? And then when everyone leaves you aren’t even certain some of your friends made it?
No?
Yeah, That’s not the type of party I like to plan either.
If the idea of not getting to see and spend time with your people on your wedding day bothers you most likely an intimate wedding or smaller is what you’re wanting.
The basic three different types/sizes of weddings:
Just you and your love, but can be up to 10 people.
Normally the point is to keep things close and personal and do what you want on a more flexible timeline.
75 people or less.
After about 80 people it would become a chore by itself in a 3-6 hour time period to make sure you're seeing everyone.
You get the benefit of inviting more people than just your immediate few people but it feels like just the cream of the crop is who you’ve surrounded yourself with.
150+ guests
By FAR the best part is that no one is getting left out, everyone gets an invite but it does tend to feel more like a show and has to be decently structured and beyond intentional in order to stay on schedule and keep everyone happy!
Obviously I’m a big fan of an intimate wedding or smaller, intimate weddings are the sweet spot between just straight eloping and having a huge party,
So that's what I’m going to speak to here.
If you want to enjoy your day with a much freer timeline, less hurry, rush and more time to connect with the most important people on one of the best days of your life, yes, your vendors and overall team that day matters but the size of your wedding will go a long way to determine how much pull there will be on you and your love the day of!
You’re not an actor and this isn't a performance, it’s your wedding day.
I'm not saying all big weddings are bad at all, but the pull that leads to inviting 300+ guests and the resolve to be intentional enough that you have time to eat in peace is not normally easy to come by!
Don't get me wrong though you have to be intentional with 75 guests too! But in a 3-6 hour time period it’s a LOT easier to connect with fewer guests in a pure and natural way then when there’s tons of people and you have to almost time each interaction so you “knock everyone off your hit list” and that’s just not the way some people want their wedding to feel.
If that’s you yay! If it’s not, hopefully I haven't offended you too much, I’m a lady of some strong opinions about this subject and while I have shot weddings that were bigger most of them seemed to have the same problem.
First off, talk with your fiancé about the way you both want your day to feel and pay attention!
Think about things like,
“Do we just want it to feel like family?”
“Like a ton of friends on a night out?”
There are other ways to describe what you’re describing but you might find you are in fact looking to do something smaller!
Go ahead and start making your lists of people!
You probably share some of the same guests, but like any party you want to make sure the people you want there get their invite!
Don’t be worried about everyone’s feelings, your people love you and understand that it’s your day and even if not that doesn’t change a thing!
You can always have another party later or do a reception on a separate day that you can choose to be larger than the ceremony if you like!
(A great time for a slideshow of your wedding photos)
An intimate wedding's main focus is connection, centering relationships especially showcasing YOUR LOVE over the pomp and circumstance.
You get to plan your day how it best serves the two of you and represents your love on your day!
Whatever you decide for your wedding days guest count It’s gonna be amazing, choose to remember that you’ll be marrying your best friend by days end, and have a blast!
If you're looking for a photographer whose priority is you having the very best day possible, not just getting the most "perfect shots" LET ME KNOW.
-Delightedly, Jean Estelle
