I’m not the biggest advocate for rushing through life, but I do like getting to do things intentionally!
What follows is basically what I would do and how I would do it if Brandon and I got engaged yesterday instead of 2+ years ago and knowing what I know from shooting weddings and seeing a LOT of behind the scenes moments!
Yaay you got engaged! This is SO EXCITING! For a little while maybe a big while that’s ALL you’ve thought about, but since you’re reading I’m guessing you’re asking yourself the very normal yet strangely concerning next question, “Now what?”
I’m addressing this to the lady who is twirling that ring on her finger and keeps glancing down at it while driving because the sun caught it. (Btw, don’t ever stop, I still cannot get over that someone loved me enough to live their whole life with me)
I’m also gonna guess this is your first time? It was mine too! And the only reason I was maybe a little more prepared for what to do next is because I’ve been professionally photographing weddings for years!
I’m not going to hit every single item on the “What to do list” I’m just going to point you to what you should 100% be deciding now so that everything else falls into place easier!
Why? Because that’s what I did and it worked amazingly well for me, the way you chose to plan and prioritize for the day the two of you become one really does set the whole tone for how you’re gonna feel the day of.
So here’s what you are going to want to decide in the next few days.
NUMBER ONE:
What is the number one thing that’s going to happen come hell or high-water on your day?
For those of you who said, “MARRY THE LOVE OF MY LIFE” you may continue, if that’s not the most important thing, I’m not even sure what the point is, but you certainly shall have a whole host of stressors if your number one goal is much else.
Make this your slogan for the day, your mantra, “I get to marry my best friend today.”
And I promise the rest of the things and can and probably will go wrong will literally feel like they never mattered at all as long as this happened.
NUMBER TWO:
What are the next two things you want to be most important to you on your day?
It can be more then 2 but I don’t recommend having 15 or even 5 “Priority items” for your day, you want focus not a general dream, make sure you and your love are one on the number one priority and then you can each really want a different thing!
Food was waaaay more important to Brandon then me and obviously photography was huge for me! But we shared number one so it was alright! Haha
NUMBER THREE:
When do you want to get married?
It’s a great idea even if you don’t instantly know the exact day and time to go ahead and get a season in mind at least! Don’t stress it! There will be time to pick the exact date but at least having a season in mind will help when it comes to booking vendors, choosing flowers, finding a venue etc, go ahead and decide if you want a wedding in the Spring, Summer, Fall or Winter, and from there the date and time will definitely be a lot easier to pinpoint.
NUMBER FOUR:
How much are you comfortable spending on this?
A lot of people find talking about money hard but this is one of those things you should go ahead and have a quick conversation about right away!
(it doesn't need to be longer than 10-15 minutes)
FUN FACT: There are actually about 40+ Million weddings every year with completely different budgets so just decide what yours is, even if it’s just a range!
If you have a family that might want to help pay ie: Parents etc, and they haven’t offered, it’s definitely ok to go ahead and ask them about it so you have all the information you need to proceed with everything else!
Once you have an overall unified goal, know when you’re getting married and how much you’d prefer to spend. I’m not kidding, everything flows pretty well from this! And you can refer back to it and will constantly! The main thing is to know what's what with your love so you aren’t having to back it up and figure out your priorities AFTER you start booking things!
How to go ahead and have this chat?
I’d highly recommend going on a date, you know, because you’re still a couple even once the question has been popped right?
I’m thinking something so low key, nothing that would be too stressful for either of you or require a lot of planning.
Burgers and the sunset in the back of a truck?
A game of Uno at Olive garden?
I’m talking Shakes , smoothies or frapes and a walk through the literal park kinda low key.
And then just talk! You want to get these things pinned down but it doesn't have to be sudden - full blown business mode just yet, K? K.
Happy planning, and btw?
Congratulations. That ring looks so good on you babe.
If you are looking for more help AT ALL don’t hesitate to reach out, And if you are wanting to build your dream team of vendors who are happy to serve, double reach out!
-Your Friendly Neighborhood Photographer
